Thursday, September 15, 2016

Week 4 Storytelling: The Kind King and Loyal Dragon

There was once a great King and Queen who ruled over all of the land. Peace and happiness was abundant under their rule, and all of their subjects loved them. The King had a pet Dragon who was his best friend and confidant. The King had gotten lost in the Great Forest as a child, and the Dragon, who was also young, found the King and returned him to the safety of his kingdom. From that moment on, the two were inseparable. The King grew strong and wise over the years, and the Dragon was always by his side.
The King met the Queen when he was walking through the streets making conversation with the people in his kingdom, as was his custom. She caught his eye as she was collecting water from a well, and the King immediately fell in love. He charmed her with his jokes and calm demeanor, and she sang with a voice likened to that of the most heavenly angels. Within a month they were married, and the three - the King, the Queen and the Dragon - lived in harmony for some time.
One day many years later, a traveller happened upon the castle where they stayed. He was weary, for his travels had taken him a long way through the Great Forest. The traveller asked for a bed and to be fed, and the King was happy to oblige. The traveller received a room in which to stay and a bath so he could relax a little, for he was quite exhausted from his journey. The King requested that he attend dinner in the great hall with himself and the Queen.
The traveller took his rest, and made his way to the great hall to dine. Upon his arrival, the King greeted him heartily. When the traveller saw the Queen, their eyes locked, and the two were struck with desire. Dinner was served and conversation was had, but the traveller and the Queen could not resist staring at each other. The King took no notice, for he was so in love with his Queen, and he was certain of her love for him.
When the dinner was over, the traveller thanked his gracious host and made way to his room. A few minutes later, a handmaiden of the Queen delivered a message to the traveller, asking him to meet her in a secret passage. The traveller, led by the handmaiden, made his way to the secret passage where he found the Queen waiting for him. They talked and drank wine, and they fell madly in love with one another. They made a plan to run away together.
The next day, the King woke to discover that his wife was gone, as was the traveller. He was distraught and heartbroken. He cursed the gods, he cursed his wife, and he cursed his kind nature for letting the traveller stay in his castle. The King called upon his Dragon to find the adulterous pair, and to do what must be done. The Dragon took flight on his mighty wings, and scanned far and wide with his sharp eyes. He discovered a set of footprints, two sets to be exact, that disappear into the Great Forest. With a mighty breath, he set fire to the Great Forest, hoping to discover the Queen and the traveller. He did not discover them until the entire forest had been set ablaze. They knelt before him and begged for forgiveness, but the Dragon's loyalty to the King was unwavering. The Dragon inhaled deeply, and set the lustful lovers ablaze.
The Dragon returned to the King and shared the unfortunate news. The King wept for ten days and nights, and his tears filled the ashes of the Great Forest. The tears he cried gave new life to the forest, but it became a haunting place, full of ghosts and monsters. All that can be heard when the wind whistles through the trees are the cries of the Queen and the traveller as they were burned to a crisp. And the King lived out his days with his loyal friend, Dragon. The End.
File:1880 Pierre Auguste Cot - The Storm.jpg
Painting The Storm, by Pierre Auguste Cot, found on Wikimedia here.
I chose this painting because it looks like lovers are fleeing into the forest.

Author's Note: I wanted to base this story on the story of the Wax Crocodile. In the original story, a scribe's wife falls in lust with a handsome young man, and they have an affair. When the scribe learns about what had happened, he carves a crocodile out of wax and puts a spell on it. He releases the wax crocodile into the lake where the handsome young man normally bathes. The wax crocodile comes to life and snatches up the young man while he bathes. The scribe's adulteress wife perishes when the scribe orders her to be tied to a stake and burned alive. I took out the magic crocodile, and replaced it with a dragon, which sounded way cooler to me. In the end, both of the lovers burn, just like the adulteress in the original story. In a way, my story is about loyalty. The dragon and the king have a long history of friendship, and they have never betrayed one another. I added their friendly backstory to make the dragon's actions seem more justified. I also added some drama by having the cheating couple try to run away. This made the story a little more exciting. The moral of the story is that a loyal friend is better than a disloyal wife, no matter how beautifully she sings, and that bad things can happen to good people.

Bibliography: Based on The Wax Crocodile, from Egyptian Myth and Legend by Donald Mackenzie, found here.

7 comments:

  1. Thorpe,

    I appreciate your honest reasoning for choosing a dragon over a crocodile, it's always better when authors are having fun with their work, and you clearly are. Otherwise, I really enjoyed this story. I was not familiar with the original, but based on your authors note, the original message still came through. I look forward to reading more of your work, thanks for sharing.

    Andrew

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  2. "They knelt before him and begged for forgiveness, but the Dragon's loyalty to the King was unwavering. The Dragon inhaled deeply, and set the lustful lovers ablaze."
    "The King wept for ten days and nights, and his tears filled the ashes of the Great Forest."
    ----
    Oh my, do I not love these sentences! They are beautifully written and really puts a specific image in your mind. I also liked the fact that you changed the crocodile to a dragon. It just seems more powerful and dangerous. The story changes from a fable (or folktale, can’t remember) to a medieval story by that inclusion and it’s wonderful. I just have one small, teeny thing. I know from reading the original story that the names are readily provided, but the idea of giving the king and queen names could really help personalize their characters even more, and by personalizing the dragon (detailsss) it can make him all the more fearsome.

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  3. Hey Thorpe! Holy crap, you are an amazing writer. You have a really, really neat style of writing which makes stories a lot more fun to read. I have not ever read the original before, but it looks like you stayed on track with it from your author's note. I will have to read the original now to see what all you changed!

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  4. Wow, this was an amazing story. You did a great job with the description within this story. I could practically envision your characters and the situations they were in. Thanks for the author's note because I have not read this story before so it was helpful that you did a good job at summarizing the original. Keep it up!

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  5. Really well done! The dragon as a loyal friend seems to becoming a common trend (How to Train Your Dragon anyone?), and it fit very well in your story. You really hit the theme of loyalty on the head too. My only critique is that the formatting was a little hard for me, but adding a line break between the paragraphs would fix that!

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  6. I really enjoy reading your style of writing! I like how your story didn't end in a happy ending. Many myths don't end in happy endings, but I have noticed that when people retell or rewrite these myths, they give it a happier ending. It is important at times to commemorate those myths by keeping a similar style of writing. Great job with the relationship between the dragon and the king.

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  7. I enjoyed reading your story. Your writing style was easy to follow and the descriptions were great. The authors note was very helpful for your story, I agree with changing it to a dragon. Dragons are more powerful. Your loyalty theme was persistent through your story which was nice. The only thing I would give you advice on was the formatting. It was difficult to read, and could have used some paragraphs to break it up! Overall, great job

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